Match Report AA1 v Olympic Eagles 22/07/12

After a barnstorming run of victories we were off to a good start with an early goal, something that had been important in sealing the previous 6 wins on the bounce. The goal came when somebody (Gay Michael?) put Chris Moore through on the halfway line with a great pass. Rather than slot the ball home having rounded the keeper, the unselfish veteran chose to put it on a plate for Walshy to head home neatly. 1-0.

In what was a sloppy first half we were glad to get in 1-0 at the break, despite being the better side, because as we were told at half time, that was pish.

We were also told at half time not to concede an early goal in the second half. But 2 minutes in despite several chances to clear the ball, it was 1-1. The tricky midfielder skinning numerous defenders all too easily and finding his unmarked Greek teammate to tap home.

Luckily for us the Greeks were making plenty of mistakes of their own at the back and after Moore was taken from behind in the box, it was a penalty (and a sexual assault charge for their defender). Once again, the unselfish Moore let Lynchy take the penalty to help him over his recent goal drought.

In what was to be the last game before Tom & Downer left for a romantic getaway together in the Galapagos Islands, Tommy P demonstrated why their long running gay love affair has endured against all the odds. After the slightly overweight Olympic Eagles left winger made a pass at Downer, Tom ran from his goal to prevent the fleeting romance from developing any further with an aggressive (sort of) push shouting “you can’t do that on a foo ball pitch” in the poshest English accent imaginable. The referee then pushed one of their players who was shouting in his face and there followed a lot of handbag swinging. That fat left winger is a (allegedly), not very nice man at all.

Many more chances followed in the second half as we continued to attack, including a good penalty shout for Andreas (who went down easier than Amir Khan) and a few decent saves from their keeper. Bren had a brilliant run after a good move but a poor finish. Then we all had to listen to Rab call him Timmy for the rest of the day.  Eventually it was Lynchy who was put through by Micheal to finish into the bottom corner and seal the points. In the dying moments Lynchy, who had failed to have his Shreddies that morning, spurned a golden chance to lay on Moore for a tap in fourth goal as he went it alone (hungry bastard). Full time 3-1.

On a bad note JC was injured after a strong challenge and is out for a few weeks, and Walshy didn’t make it to half time with a knee complaint ending his afternoon. Richie’s day also ended early after he failed to shake off the rib (anal laceration) injury suffered during a rugby (sex swing) accident involving former skipper Sam Wadsworth.

M.O.M: Baldy Nick. Solid performance again. A pivotal figure in this run of wins since making the Makelele position his own.

Note:    It’s not a good idea to write a match report a full week after the game was played. It’s difficult to remember what actually happened.