Mascot Kings 2 – BUFC 2 at L’Estrange Park on Sunday May 26th at 1pm.
The craic was mighty as the lads gathered at L’Estrange Park. Stories were retold about the banter from the raffle on Friday night. Rehashed tales included:
1. The stuff up of the botched raffle.
2. Ryan Gosling absolutely loving the build-up and suspense of the draw. And by ‘loving’ we mean the man was literally on-edge. The anticipation, nerves, highs and lows were almost too much for him. Every near miss was celebrated wildly – “Did he say 59? 59? Oh my God. 69 is still in. Come on. Yes, fooking come on!!!” He didn’t want the draw to end. Alas, it did end prematurely.
3. Pablo Escobar and his cronies getting frog-marched out of the C&H.
4. Doctor T tuning up a mature lady. It didn’t take much – a promise of a decent ride was enough for the auld girl.
5. Randy Wicks resembling a small living room, supplying over-priced booze, playing dodgy music, having rough auld birds as clientele that Doctor T would have loved, but still providing good banter.
Wynners and Gav went with a 3-5-2. Chris Hammer-ilton was deputizing in goals in replace of the injured Billy the Kid. Anders, Richy and Joe were at the back. Brendan, Gav, Fergs, Juan Manuel Marquez and Barry were in the middle with Nick Birds of a Heather and Johnny Rodeo up front. On the bench we had Joey O’Shocks, Al Dowling, Matty, Wes and Ryan Gosling. Pablo Escobar also came down to support the Barney Boys. He had busted out of the clutches of the law on Friday night and was a free man once again. His only crime: wanting to have a mint time, like!
Chris Hammer-ilton had warned about the perils of the ball slowing down due to the leaves on the pitch. Matty warned about the bobbly nature of the pitch. The ref warned that subs not leaving the pitch by the half-way line would be a bookable offense. None of this seemed to affect the girls game on before ours – that was an absolute goal fest. The game started and the Barney Boys were on the front foot. Johnny Rodeo again commanding the leading line. A long ball by Fergs released Johnny and he was off. The final defender getting in a last ditch tackle as Johnny was about to score. The resulting throw-in was launched into the box by Anders and Johnny back-headed the ball into the goal. An ingenious goal. 0-1 to the Barney Boys. It could have been 0-2 quickly after that. Nick with a ripper of a shot that crashed off the cross-bar. Johnny Rodeo converted the rebound. But the lino ruled his effort off-side. Contentious to say the least.
The tackles started to fly in. Hector was on the receiving end of a crunching tackle in midfield. Yellow card. The opposition’s sub entered the field of play but not from the half-way line. Yellow card. Their number 10 kicked the ball away after committing a foul. Yellow card. In fairness, the ref wasn’t letting much go for either side. We committed a few ‘fouls’ near our penalty area. Gav did well to get in the way of one shot that he deflected onto the cross-bar and over. Chris was doing his best in goals – saving a couple of half-chances. He was getting his body behind every shot – safe hands. Their equalizer has scrappy. The opposition had two big lads up-front. Our brick wall of a defence was doing well to hold them out – restricting them to pot-shots from distance. However, a flick-on from a throw-in and Andre the Giant got his head on it. Chris got a hand to it but it had crossed the line. 1-1 at half-time.
The half-time team-talk was frank and honest. We had to take control of mid-field and take our chances. We did neither in the first fifteen minutes of the second half. Kings had a few chances and we were lucky not to concede. Chris again to the rescue on a few occasions. Then we had another break down on the right-wing. Johnny Rodeo was released by an Anders long-ball. Johnny held the ball up and has sliced in two by a two-footed challenge. Penalty. Johnny picked himself up and converted the penalty. 1-2 to the Barney Boys.
Kings came again and put us under pressure. A low cross into the box and a sliced clearance by Joe beat Chris all ends up. 2-2. The Barney Boys responded as only they know how: courage and conviction. Barry did well on the left, beat two men and slid the ball through to Nick. He was one-on-one. He took aim and fired. The connection was perfect; almost too perfect. The Kings ‘keeper did brilliantly to save. The game petered out after this with both teams unhappy with the draw. The silence at the end of the game was deafening – a result that didn’t do either team any favours. Final score: 2-2. Good effort lads. Back at it again on Wednesday evening.
Man of the Match: Barry Blake. Never gave away possession. Fearless in defence as well as attack. Great deliveries into the box and set Nick up for the winner (almost).
Great effort: Richy Petchey. Headers, tackles, crucial clearances, blocks – this lad put in a shift and a half. Well done. Also a special mention to Chris in goals. Did everything he was asked of – solid kick-outs, safe hands and got his body behind any shots. This Barnstoneworth United legend goes from strength to strength.
Comic highlight of the match: Al Dowling’s rant after the game: “I need more game time man. Three minutes isn’t enough. I mean I was warming up for twenty minutes before coming on. But I am not complaining. So, thank-you.” Even when complaining, he maintains his dignity.